judgment has no place with food and eating habits

people love to judge food and how they eat it.

i was eating out with my father last night. apparently, he'd committed some great sin the day before, because he'd been "bad" and eaten "bad" foods, which were pizza and a hamburger. he wanted to be "good" at dinner and eat something "good." he restrained himself from eating the bread. he flip flopped on whether to order something yummy he wanted, or to go ahead and eat some boring fish he eats all the time at home. this was compounded by the fact he had not worked out that day- another grave sin. excuse me while i call the fbi. i witnessed this war going on in his head and felt sorry for him. something had happened to him that prevented him from allowing himself to enjoy food and leisure.

he caved. maybe it was my influence, i don't know. i'm just glad for it. he ate the rest of the italian bread. he ordered lamb versus salmon. i was happy for him.

a lot of people act this way. foods are labeled good and bad, and people are good or bad for eating them. when you step back and examine this concept, how does it make sense? last i heard, no one went to jail for eating pizza. our food does not have moral character, yet we easily subscribe some to it. i think this is going too far. should i put my pizza in the corner for being "bad"? is my hamburger going to lose its allowance for being "bad"? do you see how stupid it is to judge our food choices?

it is all tied in with weight, because some foods are associated with weight gain, and thus are associated with greed and fatness. this, too, is insensible. nobody is going to gain weight if they eat pizzas and hamburgers. sure, they might gain some if they are eating these foods three times a day for three weeks, but if you're not, then you're pretty safe from waking up to miraculously find extra pounds attached to your frame.

our bodies are more trustworthy than we think. we all have a setpoint range that our body settles at comfortably. trust your body; it will stay in this range. all you have to do is not go overboard- and this is what people fail to do. they starve and they binge. the reasons are numerous. the first one that comes to mind is that they have an eating disorder.

if you have an eating disorder, you are not bad. you will never be greedy or piggish. have compassion for yourself that you are battling the most dangerous psychiatric disease, which your culture is basically standing back and applauding you for. have compassion for yourself that you have lost touch with how to perform an act you did so well when you were a child- feed yourself. it's the saddest thing that so many people don't think they should be nourished. food is the basic necessity to life. to believe that you don't deserve to be fed speaks to the lowest self-worth imaginable. to be so afraid of feeling that you cover up your emotions with food is cheating yourself.

judging yourself for hating yourself just adds insult to injury, and it will make this cycle snowball and get worse. can you imagine depriving someone of food, of oxygen, of water? that would be torture. so why do you do it to yourself? what could you possibly have done to deserve this?

nothing.

food is not bad. eating is not bad. you are not bad. reject this mind frame. when you see it encouraged on diet pill commercials, laugh at it. those stupid advertisers can't fool you- they want you to feel like you're a bad person for eating? really? are you serious? this is like being in a relationship with an abusive fucker- someone is putting you down, depleting your self-esteem, and even trying to deprive you of the basic necessity of life, which will ultimately kill you. if that's not abuse, i don't know what is. and you don't have to take that shit. the background for why our culture is so fucked up and why it likes to suppress women is pretty complicated. but you DON'T have to lie back and take it. you're a human being who has critical thinking skills and who can make up his or her own mind and live the way you want to live.

the audacity of our weight loss culture and the way it beats up on people is pretty horrible. you're being told: hate yourself, hate your body, hate the fact that you're not good enough. uhh, says who? people who make money off your low self-esteem, that's who. you have the power to reject these messages. you have the ability to enjoy food, and to like your body, and to be at peace with yourself.

you have more intelligence, more worth, and more beauty than you dare to give yourself credit for. do not allow anyone to make you believe that this is not true.

this is your body. this is your life. you only get one shot. stop wasting your time acting like food is the enemy and that weight gain is a mortal threat. it's just not true. food is here to be enjoyed and to sustain your life. appreciate it and enjoy it. your body is not conspiring against you and you won't gain weight if you don't try to control your eating habits 24/7; this is a lie. plus if you DID gain weight, who cares? does your life change dramatically, do aliens come down to earth if you have increased the amount of body fat you have? no. am i going to stop being your friend and call the cops on you for gaining weight, since fat is so "bad"? no. fat, like food, is necessary to life. it's okay to have fat. you need it to LIVE. embrace it!

i regularly eat out, i don't count calories, and i eat and drink whatever the hell i want. i maintain my weight. shocking, right? not really. people have done it for thousands of years. food is your friend and your body is your temple. please treat both with kindness and respect, because you deserve endless amounts of both.